https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.thisismoney.co.uk/money/cars/article-6848139/amp/Councils-ordered-remove-pointless-road-signs-new-guidelines.html
At least, that's what the Policy says, except maybe the Law itself has been - erm -redirected somewhere on the Motorways as it doesn't seem to have reached the Communities.
We had several which had been up at least a Week after the Road Scheme they presumably referred to was finished. Even when it wasn't, the Road wasn't closed and the Lockdown was in full tilt, so very few People were commuting to Bristol and no-one was going to the Shopping Mall.
I mentioned it here before, about 2 years ago when we had Signs appear intermittently for no apparent Reason. There were no Roadworks, no Utilities being laid, no Telecoms or Cable TV Upgrades, no Accidents, no Street Fayres and no wide Vehicles. I thought it wasn't only unnecessary Clutter but also dangerous because it caused distraction and confusion with Drivers in an increasingly busy environment.
Let's play Spot the Roadworks .......
Any here?
Here maybe .....?
How about here?
The Fact that we are told about a new Traffic System here suggests it has been finished.
And that one shows you the finished System.
So what's with this?
........ Or even this?
Let's play Spot the Roadworks .......
Any here?
Here maybe .....?
How about here?
The Fact that we are told about a new Traffic System here suggests it has been finished.
And that one shows you the finished System.
So what's with this?
........ Or even this?
There were others too ......
"Pedestrian" Signs that had been there for at least a year. Like we don't know that it is a Footpath and Cycle Track and we need these very obstructive Signs to tell us!
Unless the Lunatics are on the Grass it's a bit difficult to socially distance!
Unless the Lunatics are on the Grass it's a bit difficult to socially distance!
These have since been removed, either by the Council or an irate Cyclist who crashed into them trying to keep 2m away from a Pedestrian.
This isn't the only Example of anomalous Traffic Phenomena.
How about the worst Pelican Crossing in the World ........?
This isn't the only Example of anomalous Traffic Phenomena.
How about the worst Pelican Crossing in the World ........?
Maybe this is another of these crappy Jokes ..... Y'know, why did the Chicken cross the Road ...... Drone, blah!!!!
But you stand there after pressing the Button, and wait, and wait .... and on it goes. Then, look, everything has stopped. Cars from everywhere have stopped at all the adjacent Junctions, but ....... the Green Man hasn't appeared yet, or that "Bleep, Bleep" Sound. People in their Cars start glowering at you, tapping on their Steering Wheels, wondering why you haven't crossed yet. You look back at them, wondering why they have stopped, but you aren't being told to cross, and this goes on for ages. Then the Cars start again - continuing their Journey and you feel perplexed, wondering what all that was about. Then it all starts again ..... until either you, or the Drivers say "stuff it" and decide to act anyway. All very very dangerous!
Maybe it's a Ruse by the adjacent Macdonald's to make you buy a Burger!
And with even fewer Roadworks than before Weeks later we still had this one .....
As you can see, it is so pointless even the Bus Driver chose to ignore it.
And then, they reappeared .......
Except, rather like the previous one Buses are exempt, along with anyone else who decides to ignore it. The thing is, many years ago now there used to be another rather more useful Sign here telling you about an Accident Black Spot because People couldn't see Stuff coming into the Junction where Coombe Road and Slade Road formed a Crossroads. Either this is where we do fake Brummie Accents and pretend to be Slade and check into Meg Mortimer/Noel Gordon's tacky Midlands ATV Soap Opera Motel or this is a take on the Black Spot from "Treasure Island".
Whichever we choose it's very dangerous and completely unnecessary.
And, sure enough, yet more have appeared for some incongruous Reason. Photos will be posted in the next few days ......
Watch this Space.
Here's a nice friendly Roadsign ....
If it's still there in the next day or so I'll go on Recon to see what all the Fuss was about!
Maybe one night someone might replace them with this instead .......
Or even this .......
Another Brick in the Wall huh?
How lovely??????
And there's more...... In the last 2 weeks or so we've had these .......
Don't point, it's "rude" LOL!!!!!!
Then there was this one, since pinched/removed probably because of its complete and utter uselessness.
Why were these positioned at either end of the High Street? Maybe we're in Waitrose or even the BBC Library.
Maybe I should have a concurrent Thread called "Fake Stats". Why are those of my Visits to the Site in the United Kingdom recorded as being in Belgium?
ReplyDeleteAnd while we seem to have all that, here's a thing .....
ReplyDeleteAn Article appears about David Gilmour and the "Secret behind" the Sound on "Comfortably numb".
The thing is, while they tell us he plays his classic 1969 Black Strat with a Seymour Duncan Pick-up at the Bridge the Photo has him playing a rather battered Sunburst Telecaster.
You don't suppose he sells Tents and Skateboards, hiding behind a Tree in his spare time do you?
Or maybe he's turning into Carol Bersaker ....
Now, that's what I do call wierd!
And while U2 and Brit Floyd played at Red Rock, maybe he'll be playing at Redcliffe!
Doing "Rocky Mountain Way"!
And then he'll play it in Sainsbury's, with Robbie Williams on guest Vocals!
The BBC should reshow "Stellar Street" with some new Characters. The Name itself suggests "Interstellar Overdrive" the Pink Floyd Tune, while we have 'Angus Young' and 'Bon Scott' who run a Pub, 'Joe Walsh' and 'Glen Frey' who sell Skateboards, maybe even 'George Harrison' to name but a few. Except, while I could use Mel Bravehearts Trick against him (the Scene in the Film where he speaks French and Latin back to a patronising English Envoy), I could do my Gilmour on Guitar Routine with Mr "Collecting" or thrust a Guitar at 'George' singing "Hey Mr Tambourine Man play us a Song" to see if he actually could.
ReplyDeleteMight even do it with some of these Leopard Print People, see if they could do anything from the Album "High and dry"! That and keep a Tape Measure to see how tall they are!
They ought to have a Transexual called Robbie Bersaker too, who used to be a 70's Pop Star before joining Take That.
The Series was based in Surbiton which was also where 1970's Comedy "The Good Life" was set, and while the former has John Sessions and Phil Cornwell pretending to be all sorts of 'A' List Celebrities - Micheal Caine, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, Mick Jagger, Kieth Richards etc - the latter shows Richard Briers and Felicity Kendal turning their suburban House into a self-sufficient Plot to the Chagrin of snooty pretentious Neighbours Penelope Keith and Paul Eddington.
ReplyDeleteThat, in the end, the 2 Comedians aren't any of those ultra famous People at all, but whose Stereotypes they have borrowed as they perpetuate their Fantasy. Stereotypes that could be used in a Game of Juxtaposition like they do here. The 'Weepy" Guitarist, the 'Eagles', the 'ACDC', the 'Def Leppards' - and the many others, but in the end it's just a huge Housing Estate with some rather pretentious People.
How many People here are like Stellar Streets Al Pacino - who thinks he's tall for example? Funny when I meet them and most of them are shorter than I am. We also have 'Clint Eastwood' who has been staying at the Travelodge for the last few years like he was in a Sergio Leone Movie, except, while he might be tall his Beard Colour doesn't match his Hair!
Oh, and did I mention 'King Charles' who is actually a Spaniel who thinks he's/she's a Cop?
ReplyDeleteStellar Street ......?
ReplyDeleteMaybe there are People here who think they're the Mc Cart Neys! The Beatle does look a bit like Pacino after all, while perhaps Mr Cornwell was an occasional Guitarist/Singer with the Stranglers ...... "Buddy"!
Then there's the biggest Joke of all, Hollywood.
ReplyDeleteHow many fake Hero's do they give us?
We watch this Stuff and they're like the Pied Piper, except they don't do it with Rats, they do it with People. It's disgusting, and very insincere.
While, every one of them has a built in Obsolescence. How many of us watched "King Arthur" with Clive Owen and Kiera Knightly? The bit where she tells him "We are not the polite People of Poetry!"
But we all root for her during the Battle with the Saxons.
That was 2004, but what if we fast forward to "The Hobbit" and Smaug. "I am Death" he says just before swooping on Lake Town.
Then we find the Twist.
"Enter the Dragon, exit Johnny Clarke".
Says Mancunian Poet John Cooper Clarke in "Kung Fu international" who later says he's "a Shadow of the Man he used to be".
What's sinister about that? You might ask, until you remember President Obama's State of the Union Address where he described Al Qaida as "a Shadow of its former self".
Ah, right, so Kiera the Hero in a Bruckheimer Movie isn't a polite Poet, but John Cooper Clarke is, except he seems to have been lumped in with foreign Terrorist Mercenaries in Afghanistan. But wait, is Smaug the Dragon who has just laid waste the Lake Town in a Peter Jackson Movie the same who reduced Johnny Clarke to the "Shadow" he used to be.
Maybe he's Drogon in "Game of Thrones", who at the behest of Emilia Clarke does same to Euron Greyjoys Fleet and Kings Landing as she continues her War on Slavery.
But hey, let's go back to the 60's and The Grateful Dead, who, of course, aren't alive, while someone from Israel introduces herself as Chaim - or "Life". Then we had "Come together" - insincere Beatles Hippie Shit and then "Dark side of the Moon" by Pink Floyd, which we MUST like or else. In the 90's we had Beatles 2 - which we must also like or Oasis will burn yer Club down. Fast forward to the end of the Decade Sharleen Texas prattles on about that "Summer Sun", and Martine Bankrupt goes on about those "Rules" in "Over you".
So everyone from Gerry Garcia to certain Film Makers and former Eastenders are as fake and full of crap as that Roadsign at the Corner of High Street and Coombe.
Didja get a free Tube of Vaseline with those Albums so you can daub on the Slime?
Yippies are a bad Joke too.
What pisses me off about them is how - when I might have looked a bit like that it was the early 80's when it was discouraged severely by the Fashion Police. Now it's all completely unobtainable it's become compulsory.
Aren't they having their Cake and eat it?
The thing is, it isn't just the fake Hero's of Hollywood, there's what they did with People who went to Vietnam.
ReplyDeleteIn the superb Documentary "Hearts and Minds" we meet an Afro-American former GI disabled in a 'friendly fire' Napalm Bombing which quite literally cost him an Arm and a Leg, who tells us how, when he went in 1965 he was seen off as a Hero, like you could imagine a Bunch of Cheerleaders waving Pom Poms. When he came back it was like no-one wanted to know. They'd got him to support a War to the point where he fought in it, then it was as if they were ashamed of even thinking about it.
As you can appreciate he was very angry about it, and wasn't going to back down at People's indifference.
As for 'Clint Eastwood', he reminded me of Cliff Jones - former NME Journalist who fronted 90's Indie Band Gay Dad. Either his Eyebrows were lying, or his Hair, while 'Clint' couldn't seem to tell the difference between 3 Months a a couple of Years!
Meanwhile, we still seem to be having this Stats in Belgium thing ....
ReplyDeleteAfter I've either browsed or written on this Site in Britain the Stats show this has happened in Belgium.
When I googled "why do Stats appear as Belgium"? I got all sorts of peculiar Results, one of which being the CIA Website Page about the Belgian Flag.
Oh, those "3 vertical Stripes" and all that huh!
Maybe if they had done a better Job in pre-Iraq War Levant, keeping Tabs on Beijing via a vis several other Countries, provided better Intel to several Presidents and been more vigilant about Covid19 the World might be a safer place!
Yours sincerely
A Resident of the United Kingdom.
Here's a thing .....
ReplyDeleteBrowsing the fake Property Sites, y'know those horrible Clickbait too good to be true Bulshitters - and there's a Property supposedly available in New Quay, Wales. It tells you about the "Level" Walk into the Town etc. So you find the Location, and then trace this "level walk" using Google Maps, where you scroll on the line imposed onto the Roads. Fine, for a while, then you get to a Junction to somewhere called "School Lane" (now there's a Name) and that fucking Map keeps sending you there instead of the Town. It doesn't matter how much you try not to, it keeps doing it.
Of course, this is one of those "Diversions" isn't it, where they take you to a School - or at least a "Road" called "School Lane" - although I'm not sure if that should have a "Penny" in front of it, or an "Arnold".
Maybe I should ask the Bloke who writes Shit in local Coffee Table Magazines, or even whoever the Manager of Google Maps might be. That's when I also ask them about these "Belgium" Stats!
One thing is certain, that Sign isn't written in Pashtoun (Iranian), or Mandarin/Cantonese (Chinese). That while a few square Miles of South West England and an illegal War - erm - distracted the West, China and Iran have just struck a Deal that could alter the whole Balance of Global Power.
ReplyDeleteThose Beatles Songs huh!
And while all this goes on, why does this Phones Browser sometimes show Gumtrees Website after I left it for a while? When I use it again it shows their Site, despite having not visited it for Months. Is this connected with that Google Maps virtual "Diversion"?
ReplyDeleteOh, and how about these fake Plastic Flowers?
ReplyDeleteNow, about these 'Time Tables'!
ReplyDelete30 years ago, those Hippie were given their big Chance to prove that the Crap they've been banging on about since the 60's wasn't just a scammy Public Relations Stunt. That it wasn't all just "Do goody good Bulshit" eh Mr Gilmour!
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'll ask the Woman who does the Ship to Shore at the Harbour for her Comment ......
Erm, "Over"!
Statues aren't immune anymore!
And I'm not surprised that Music, or at least what all that Crap has done to it, is dying. One of the only things it had was it's supposed Social Conscience. If it becomes apparent that that never, let alone no longer, applied there are far more effective ways of making Money.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's a Scam that started with "Drive my Car" by the Drab Bore, and continued with "Interstellar Overdrive", except the Hippies who subscribed to it might feel scammed if their precious Pink Floyd turned out to be a former Eastender who hasn't made a Record in years.
And while it erm 'now' scams that Project, whoever any Duff Gordon's might be 30 years ago are not those we might have now. It's like a phoney Pretence like the 90's trying to be the 60's.
ReplyDeleteNext thing y'know they might try and re-enact the Velvet Revolution, and exhume Vaclav Havel.
So, fake Duff Gordon's, to go with the fake Roadsigns and the fake Freedom.
ReplyDeleteBut the operative Quote from the "Titanic" Movie is when Jack says "Someone's Life is about to change" - except his didn't, while what did Lady Kate become in the 23 years since the Film was made and shown?
The X3x huh!!!!
ReplyDelete"Left of the Middle"?????
ReplyDeleteIn "The Wire" we are at the Baltimore Sun and Scott Templeton a Reporter,
there has been manufacturing Stories. Fake Quotes, bogus Interviews abound in his Work and Gus Haynes the Editor is suspicious. He commissions Robert Rubin to sift through it all to confirm it.
He does, and describes it as a Woollen Jumper with a loose Thread that unravels once you pull it. He mentions one so called 'Source' who told him "I wish I did say that, but I'm not that smart!"
Haynes finally confronts Templeton about another Quote which he has removed from the Article. "It was a perfect Quote" Templeton claims in response. "That's my Concern" Haynes replies.
It was too perfect!
A few Days ago I went to Bristol on the Bus. It had stopped at the Bus Stop shown in the above and was indicating to turn left, the opposite Direction to where the Roadsign was pointing. I got on it and it turned right.
"I wish I had written that Song, but I'm not that smart"
Either that or Natalie Imbruglia is the CEO of First Bus who writes a few Songs in her spare time!
You don't suppose Officer Walker from "The Wire", bullying Scumbag who robs Street Kids and breaks their Fingers is a yellow Roadsign do you?
ReplyDeleteHe's a bit like Detective Constable Terry Walsh in "Twin Towns"!
Meanwhile, it seems our Roadsign is suffering a directional malfunction.
ReplyDeleteWhile it always seemed to point to the Right - which it did for a very long time and for Reasons that should be asked about the next time the Council has a Meeting - now it seems to be pointing straight ahead. I'll grab a Photo of this and from it you will see that that either leads to a Bench or Carey's DIY, not any actual Road or Street. This must be very confusing to any Drivers who don't know the Area.
As the poor Loves at the Council don't seem to have the Resources to manage their Street Furniture maybe we should take the thing down and leave it outside the Folk Hall where they have those Meetings.
Y'know, I sometimes wonder how many of these Property Listings are fake.
ReplyDeleteShould I ask Steptoe and Son why there seems to be a lot of cheap Houses in Scotland?
(Not so) magnificent!
And they flew those Flying Machines in 1965, when I was about a year and a half old!
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, back 'at the Sign of Bulshit' maybe someone should observe the Highway Code, take it literally, and drive into the Builders yard it points to. When asked why they say they were only obeying the Roadsigns!
ReplyDeleteAnd today, the Roadsign has suffered an Inversion. It now either points backwards, or underground! Is a Rocker on the Council having a Go at the Modfather as Paul Weller was "Going underground" with the Jam? Or maybe it's those "Pubs, Wormwood Scrubs, and right wing Meetings" People!
ReplyDeleteEither/or this just proves it's Bulshit!
From fake Road Signs to fake Hair Colour ......
ReplyDeleteAnd fake Property Listings .....?
ReplyDeleteNow, here's a thing ....
About 2 years ago there was a good value Property Listing, or so it seemed. Then, after a while it was removed - presumably sold. I wanted to research it to see how much it sold for and there are Websites that give you the recent Sales History of somewhere. Except there was no Entry for it anywhere. One that might have been was last sold in 2009.
Not even Google Images had anything, which is odd because they do have Stuff from Property Pages in their Archive going back several years.
So it's like the Listing never existed.
Maybe they were laundering the Money in the adjacent Launderette.
There are others, which always seem to be the number 3. Some that never show Interior Photographs, like they took a Picture of a random House and put it on the Market.
Why are these Stats still appearing as "Belgium" by the way?
ReplyDeleteAnd how about fake News or bogus Media? While "The Wires" Scott Templeton makes up Stories, complete with fake Quotes and non existent Interviews, I know someone else who has Articles published about People without ever interviewing them? Wonder if he makes up the Weather too, or maybe he's learning to fly!
ReplyDeleteIs that a Plane?
Maybe he plays a Gibson Gold Top!
ReplyDeleteSuch lovely genuine, sincere People huh!
Oh, erm Cheers by the way!
ReplyDeleteI've double checked to see if People couldn't drive down the High Street but they can. They close it for the annual Carnival Procession and Christmas Fayre but neither applies, while there are no Roadworks either. Sometimes they might put a Sign up telling us that the High Street will be closed pending these but this isn't one of them.
ReplyDeleteI say this because what might be a fake Diversion could cause very real Distraction as Drivers see it and glance around to see why. They'll be doing this at a notoriously dangerous Junction.
Success .....
ReplyDeleteSaid Roadsigns seem to have been removed!
And just to confirm that these Road Signs are intact fake, and have no Reason to be there, I can connect a Conversation I had with a Bovine a few Years ago, a Character played by Leonardo Decaprio and even something Martin Sheen said in a very recent Interview. All just a load of old Bull Terriers!
ReplyDeleteThe one thing they don't signify is any disruption to Traffic at all. No Roadworks, Utility laying, Accidents, Wide Vehicles or Road Closures.
And what is particularly weird about them is how they direct you onto actual Roadworks. You travel down the High Street, see these things and turn Left to go up Stoke Road. Suddenly you come to a Road Closed Sign and another directing Traffic the complete opposite of where you have just come from. So if you heeded them, not only do you end up on a narrow Road you wouldn't have travelled on. You also end up on one that is having to cope with redirected Traffic going in the opposite direction because of resurfacing Work.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, on "new year's Day", it seems that "Traffic Control" might be a bit edgy. That or a big Pile of Clothes Horse Poo.
ReplyDeleteNow, about this "Way Control" Sign on Stoke Road the other Day Graham Bowie or David Coxon. And how about these "Mutton Bangers" Tim?
ReplyDeleteI think we've got a bit of a thing going on just below the Surface here.
ReplyDeleteWatch this Space as I keep you posted.
Clue Soundtrack ....
"Taxman" by the Beatles. Anything by Gaz Coombe's Band Supergrass, any Song with the Word "Baby" somewhere in the Title, and the Theme from "The Deer Hunter"!
Glad I'm not in receipt of any Benefits then!
Tell ya what ....
ReplyDeleteInstead of some of these useless fake spooky Road Signs, how about some useful ones that actually tell you how to get somewhere?
Whoever designed that Development should be shot.
The other day I was trying to get to the Marina from the Industrial Estate and got caught up in a lot of blind Alleys. It was like being trapped in a Labyrinth as none of these Streets seemed to lead anywhere. It occurred to me that I could have been an Emergency Worker, trying to find a House or Flat, but couldn't because where the hell is everything?
I also remembered a Conversation I had with a former Avon Fire Officer.
He'd left the Service but told me how they had told the Developers some of those Streets are too narrow for the Fire Truck. This means you could burn alive while they can't get the Unit close enough to you. Couple this with how the Buildings are too close together and built with questionable Materials and you have a Recipe for disaster.
Also, even if they connected a Hose to a Hydrant there's no guarantee of any Water going through it. All the Mains Supply on the Estate is below Sea Level and has a huge demand put on it from 1000's of Kitchens, Bathrooms and Utility Rooms so there might not be enough Water Pressure for the things to work properly.
So, instead of these useless Road Signs so you can weep crocodile Tears into your Guitar or have a Chortle at any Firemen with Hour Glasses how about a user friendly Estate which isn't like a David Bowie Movie or something Bruce Ismay might have commissioned.
That Conversation was probably in about 2012, but could have been in 1912, the only difference being 100 years.
The other day I travelled to London on the Coach and I noticed how there seemed to be rather a lot of "Diverted Traffic" Signs along the Route.
ReplyDeleteThe thing is, I've done that Route many times and not once did the Coach 'deviate' from it, so not only were they somewhat pointless, they probably caused a lot of Confusion with Drivers travelling through the Capital.